Friday, June 15, 2012

Don't say Mornings

A Day in the Life of Dog Rescue:

It is a very rare occasion that I get a good nights sleep.
Normally I sleep diagonally, so that I do not disturb Capone, who now weighs 75 pounds. Regardless of how much room he has, he seems to make sure to curl up right next to me, gradually stretching out throughout the night until I am lucky to occupy the upper corner of my Queen size mattress. Of course I can't blame it all on the dogs, stressing how to pay bills, get good grades and run a rescue make sleep pretty impossible. I am actually surprised impressed that I function at all, but it does tend to explain my increasing need for caffeine.

Back to sleeping. So when I actually do sleep, I am ecstatic. *well actually I am asleep, so I guess I am not really anything*
Here is me,.. sleeping. (or at least here is a picture I drew of Z's in various sizes that is meant to represent me sleeping, though it might look as if I am snoring oddly, and as I am single, it does not matter if I do. Either way, that is enough on that subject)
Often times, I wish I was one of those people that could sleep indefinitely, but that is not the case. I am a clock watcher. Sure it is not so bad if I have no where to be, or nothing to do early in the morning, but even without that, I watch the clock. I don't mean to. In fact, not having a clock does not make me stop, because then, I look outside and try to gauge what time it is by how light it is outside. Yes, I really do that. Of course, I can't just have one of those small, none irritating alarm clocks that gently tell you the time. No I have a huge, annoying one that is bright enough to burn the time into my retinas. 

After I close my eyes again (and eventually the sting of my scorched eyeballs fades), I think to myself "I have an hour before I have to be up, I will just go back to sleep" Now when I say, (have to be up) it is more so because the dogs in the house need to potty in the morning, and even though I would love to lounge in bed until I am rested, that would mean having to clean up messes that I honestly don't want to think about 
*Times 4* so, it is really in my best interest to be as punctual as possible. So I settle back in, get comfortable, pull the covers to my chin and head off to sleep. 
But Wait!! I must check the time Again!! Did I oversleep? What time is it? It sure feels as if I have overslept! Look at how light it is outside, it MUST be late! 

Nooooooooooooo!!!! 5 Minutes!!!! Now I am angry, which is a completely irrational feeling unless it is someone else who is waking you up, in which case,  understandable. Since it was me, waking myself, to obsessively check the time, I felt pretty stupid. I might laugh if this happened once in a blue moon, however, I do this more than I care to admit, thus making it pathetic and sad.

What happens normally after this is that I finally drift off to sleep approximately 15 minutes before all the dogs wake up for good and no amount of pretending to be dead will make them settle back down to sleep.Once the first dog stands and shakes his head, they are all up, stretching and yawning. Mia's tail locates the object or door that will produce the loudest sound when struck and proceeds to wag rhythmically until my head is throbbing in time with the deafening noise.

Capone starts to lick my feet (usually because during the night he steals my covers and claims the majority of the mattress, causing my feet to hang off the edge), as if this will cause me to wake up in a good mood. Soon, he will creep towards the pillows, stare at me for a bit and start licking my face.I am not really sure why I drew slobber in such a way, but it represents the film of drool that Capone leaves behind on any surface he licks. Resistance is futile. 

The dogs win, they always win. I shuffle out of bed, grumpy and exhausted. I emphasis the Grumpy. Because it is very important. Now that I am up, I am up all day. All Day! Blah!
As you can tell, everything is doom, gloom and a strange yellow spider that should be a sun, but there is a line through it so either way I want nothing to do with it. And rain, and Blah! and mad faces. Damn it don't forget the mad faces! The only thing good is Coffee! Yes Coffee!!

That is when I let the dogs outside. Mia hops like a bunny in a spring meadow, full of life. Capone acts as if this is the first time he has ever seen the yard! Everyone is happy, excited and delighted to potty in the yard because life is good!

It bothers me that my dogs enjoy waking up so much. I can't fully enjoy hating mornings when I have such happy animals. So this is a day morning in the life of a Dog Rescue. Now get me some coffee.

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